feelin' frightful

it is quite easy to say or give advice to someone than it is to take those same advice, quite frankly because all you have to do is say the words and the person your giving advice to has to be the one to do the action which is usually so much harder.

I have had various encouragement, safety, love and etc talks with my friends or acquaintances and had given my fair share of advice to them when they consult with me or just want a sound wall to vent to. As I am right now i am afraid and anxious, feeling no safety in my own home (as explained by my previous post). the quote i posted before is too true that it just makes it even harder.

To be aware that at any moment in your life someone or something can happen that would turn your life too painful is positively horrible to feel. it wakes us up from our dreams of bad things only happening to other people. It makes you realize the fatality of it all, how weak we actually are as a person and the lengths your are willing to go to feel safe again, if you can feel safe again, or for that matter be the same person you were.

Shit Happens

So i think my house just got robbed again. were not sure if it was an inside job or if it was someone new who robbed us or the same one who robbed us before all i know is I am afraid. in this incident they were able to get away with a lot of money and this in it self pisses me off, but sadly the fear and anxiety is not from what was stolen. the fear and anxiety comes from the fact that we don't even know how they did it considering that it was locked in our safe and very few people within our family know of the combination or even the fact that there was such a large amount there or if it was someone in the family, but i digress.

the fear and anxiety as those who were home invaded or had been the victim of illegal doings should probably know deep down is that it could happen again. a home hardly becomes a home when you no longer feel safe in it. the streets outside your house become dangerous and filled with bad people. the strangers still remain strangers but now with a sense of anxiety when you are in too large a crowd. quite honestly my own experiences in this field are comparatively smaller compared to those i know and in that i believe i am lucky enough. the moral is bad people exist.

"Erica: I always believed that fear belonged to other people. Weaker people. It never touched me. And then it did. And when it touches you, you know... that it's been there all along. Waiting beneath the surfaces of everything you loved. " - The Brave One (2007).